Do you know what makes you happy?

When will you be happy?

Think about it….

Maybe you’d come up with something like – when I get a nice job, when my boyfriend stops fighting with me, when my book gets published, when…..

Okay.

Can you be happy right now?

Umm… Idk maybe…

What can make you happy right now?

A pizza!

Hahaha… I know you were thinking something similar….

Or maybe a dog

Or maybe cat

Or maybe your best friend


Yesterday I talked to my friend and she said there is so much trouble going on right now…

I’d be so happy if this all just ends..

And I thought about it…

Do good things really happen when bad things stop happening?

She was right at her place… When everything around you sucks hurts, you might feel like things will be much better and you would be happier without all this

But are you really happy when bad things stop happening?

No!

You won’t have a pizza if you are not eating vegetables

You might have something else!

What I mean is, we focus too much to making the bad stuff around us go away….

We try to make things right

And that’s okay!

Completely okay

But we’re under illusion that this will make us happy

We might feel relief… That okay… Thankfully this is over

But are you really happy?

Nope!

You need some different activities to make you smile…

As Martin Seligman once said that his patients came to him saying ‘I just want to be happy’ what he translated was that ‘you don’t want to feel distressed’ and then after working on the patients anxiety or depression issues, he thought he will get a happy patient… But he didn’t. he got an ’empty patient’. That’s when he said you cannot have mental health and wellbeing just by eliminating depression and mental illness, you need different activities to build wellbeing.


Just because it isn’t raining doesn’t mean there is sunshine

You can work on this…

Think about what really makes you happy and do more of that in your daily life

Take a little break from fixing everything n just be… Create your happiness…

Especially during these challenging times… That’s what you need to do the most 🌼💖🌻

But maybe being happy is not your priority right now… Maybe it’s caring for your friend or family member who is struggling. And that is okay, you can take some time to recharge yourself by listening to your favourite song, reading a paragraph from your favourite book or talking with your sister, just do it. Take a little time for yourself too, that way you have more to give others… When your cup is full, then you can fill others💗💕

Things to understand

It’s true. When there are so many unhappy people around us, so many disasters going around.. you might feel guilty for being happy.

Tbh these days when I study positive psychology and it includes concepts of happiness and wellbeing I feel weird. Like why am I doing this? I’m not even in the mood of thinking about wellbeing when I’m seeing problems all around me.

But then I realised, positive psychology is not just about feeling happy emotions all the time.

When you are feeling low, you’re facing real problems and feeling like you are stuck in dark cave of hopelessness, positive psychology helps you accept your situation, believe that you can get out of this and helps you actually deal with the situation in a helpful way.

That made me get back to studies. Plus, it also encouraged me to apply all the interventions that I’m learning about in my daily life and benefit from that.

When you feel low, you don’t really want to do anything. Your attention is focused at one particular negative thing and you simply ignore everything positive that’s around you.

When we feel negative emotions our immediate response is fight or flight. We narrow down our focus. For human beings to survive this is necessary.

But at the same time there are benefits of feeling positive emotions.

When you feel better not only you take other things into consideration, you are more likely to contribute to others happiness.

We all know that we can’t give what we don’t have. What about happiness then?How could you make others happy when you are feeling low?

Again there’s nothing wrong with feeling low. I understand. These are tough times. We all are going through a lot. It’s okay to feel sadness, anger, grief. It’s completely natural. It’s human.

Take your time. Recharge. Refill yourself with love and care.

But remember you are not hurting anyone by being happy. In fact, research has proven this – you are much more likely to contribute to others happiness when you yourself are happy and grateful.

Take care guys!❤️

positive emotions at workplace

I joined as salesperson in Shah enterprises a few years ago. I didn’t have much knowledge of sales but I really needed a job and this seemed right at the moment.

Selling was hard. We had to face lots of rejections every single day. But despite of that we had to continue our work with the same enthusiasm. Eventually I got comfortable with people turning me down. I knew that after 100 rejections I will sell one product. I knew every door that I knock on wasn’t meant for me and also that eventually, I will find the right door.

Everyone around me was super competitive. They didn’t invest their emotions into their work. Maybe over the years they had learnt that making that sale is the only thing they need. They all were running for achievement, that others praise. They felt that emotions only get in their way of success and worked like emotionless robot for the entire day.

I was not one of them. That’s not how I wanted to live my life. I liked talking to people. I enjoyed making emotional connections with them. Not that I was too emotional about everyone or stuff, it’s just that I liked connecting with people on a deeper level.

For every sale I did, I remember having a great time talking to the buyer. Sometimes people were rude too, but I used to tell myself that it’s okay, maybe they’re just having a bad day.

Slowly, my sales began to rise. Earlier there were times when I sold just one product in two weeks, now it was 3-4 in a week. My colleagues were jealous of me, to be honest, they were working harder than me. But I seemed to get better results.

After some time I was promoted as Team Leader. I trained my team well and just told them to enjoy what they were doing. I told them it’s okay if they didn’t make a sale, I wanted them to make connections with people. I wanted them to feel good at the end of the day and not frustrated. I told them to shift their focus from making a sale as their only motive to enjoy the process of making a sale.

After a few months, my team made the highest number of sales that month. I was so happy and proud!

Next year I was made Branch Manager. Things just got better after that.

What I’ve learnt in all these years is that, enjoying your work now is important. People are mostly hard on themselves and work day and night just to be successful. Even if you become successful the next day, you will be worried about another challenge that comes your way. Again working hard for success. It keeps going on.

Sometimes its important to enjoy the process of getting there. Not just the end result. Process is equally important.

In my case, I’ve seen that when I feel emotionally good, I am more productive. I am enthusiastic the next day to come to work. Emotional gratification is necessary for success.

As they say, success depends on 20% IQ and 80% on EI. That is emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence also applies to you, how you use your emotions to become successful.

At the end of the day, I am glad I didn’t fell into the trap of rat race and did what I felt right.

And as you can see, it turned out quite well.

– Amit Kumar

(National Sales Manager, Shah enterprises)


Research shows that positive emotions at workplace lead to better productivity and workplace satisfaction.

There is growing evidence that positive emotions influence variables vital for workplace success such as positive beliefs, creativity, work engagement, positive coping, health, teamwork and collaboration, customer satisfaction, leadership, and performance.


References –

Ed Diener, Stuti Thapa, Louis Tay

Annual Review of Organizational Psychology and Organizational Behavior 2020 7:1, 451-477


P.S – Guys this is a fictional story I wrote to illustrate my point. It’s not about me or anyone I know.

Also if you want to connect with me on instagram, here’s my id – @vivacious_vruuu

Take care guys!!

Why is positive psychology important for you?

For many years psychologists were interested in abnormal behaviour and mental disorders. That’s why today for many people psychology seems to be equivalent to Abnormal Psychology.
But the field of psychology is much vast than this.

Psychologists now are interested in what consists in a “good life”? What makes our life meaningful? How can we achieve wellbeing? What makes us happy?

This gave birth to positive psychology in 1998.
Now the word “positive” doesn’t mean that this is the only branch of psychology that is important and others are insignificant or “negative”

Actually, positive psychology and abnormal psychology both work hand in hand to make human life better.


How’d your life be without any doctors in town? Just your friends and family to make you happy.. will you really be happy? What if you get some illness? You need doctors for that.

In the same way Abnormal Psychology helps us by treating mental illness. And positive psychology helps us to enhance our happiness.
Both are necessary for overall well-being of mankind.
One helps us by reducing mental illness and other helps us by strengthening mental health.

Do you sometimes feel like you’re not really happy with your life? There’s nothing really bad happening to you.. but still, you don’t feel like you’re not living your life to the fullest.

The absence of negative doesn’t mean the presence of positive. That’s where positive psychology comes in. It helps you live a balanced and happy life. It deals with questions like – what makes you happy? What leads to wellbeing? What are the characteristics of happy couples? How can you be successful and happy? How can you enhance positive emotions in your life?
It deals with concepts like – gratitude, compassion, kindness, altruism, happiness, wellbeing, mindfulness, resilience, hope, savouring, grit, etc.


We understand that talking rudely with someone constantly will damage our relationship with the other person. Does this mean that simply not talking rudely with someone will strengthen our relationship with other person?

Good behaviours are not simply the opposite of bad behaviours.
To strengthen your relationship with someone you might need to appreciate that person, spend quality time together, be kind to one another and make eachother laugh.

Sometimes people wonder what does their relationship lack when there are not really any conflicts happening. Most of the times it’s the absence of positive behaviours which strengthen the relationship.

That’s how positive psychology helps you. And this is why you need to understand what behaviours you need to practice for a happy and meaningful life.

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