When people show you who they really are, believe them the first time.
– Maya Angelo
Wow. What a quote! It might not strike as a significant one in first glance or might seem like really obvious.
But there is a deep meaning to it.
Do we really pay attention when people show us who they really are?
Do we really pay attention to all the cues? To the intuitions that we get when we meet someone?
Many a times we don’t pay attention. Thinking “everyone is actually good”
But no. Some people are not. In fact they can be so poisonous that you end up regretting every single moment with them. You end up regretting not listening to your intuition. You end up regretting not believing them when they showed you who they truly are.
Let’s say you are really attracted to this guy. You get in relationship with him. You both like each other and everything is going well. But on the first date he tells you, he doesn’t like other guys staring at you. You brush it off as him being protective and continue the relationship. Then one day he sees you smiling at your cell phone screen and asks you who are you talking to, you say it’s your friend at work. And he just snatches the phone out of your hand and asks you to show him your chats. You explain that you’re not cheating on him and that you are just his friend. He is stubborn. So you give in. You show him your phone and he clears his doubts and he gives you phone back with a warning to stay away from guys. You feel really weird and get a intuition that you should get away from him. But you ignore that, because you love him. Then after a few months your colleague drops you off at night in his car after a office party. When he comes to know this, he takes out all his anger on you. He beats you, tells you why didn’t you listen when he warned you the first time……
He gave you hint
He showed you in little ways who he really was…
You failed to listen
I am of course not blaming you or any person who goes through this, I just want to warn you people to pay attention. Notice the details.
Not everything might be serious. They might say some things as a joke. Like real fun.
But notice the patters… They really are something.
We don’t observe because we are under illusion that this person is nice… Because we’re attracted to them.
Don’t decide anything
Let them show you how they are…
Nice,kind,arrogant,moody,impulsive, let them show you. Through their actions.
When someone tells you they are impulsive, stubborn, they don’t like certain things, they behave in certain way, believe them! (Also the actions) They know more about themselves than you do.
When you don’t listen to your intuition, its whisper gets louder and louder until you are forced to deal with the situation.
I have been through this. I had to pay the price of not paying attention when people showed me their real self.
You get to choose people you spend time with. Make the best possible use of that choice and only choose the people who are good for you emotionally, mentally, spirituality.
These are two wonderful podcasts episodes about this from Supersoul Conversations hosted by Oparh.