who will be more happy?

Scene 1Roopa got admitted to new school. She didn’t have many friends. She talked to 2-3 girls at the most. When they invited her to come and sit with their group, she was just too shy to join. When asked about it, she used to say “why should I go first? They should come and talk to me” She didn’t even interact much with her cousins and family either.

Scene -2 Khushi was also admitted to the same school in same class with Roopa. She was very excited about new school and making new friends, within a week everyone in class knew Khushi. She made lots of friends and had good relations with everyone. When asked about it “I am really interested in getting to know people. I love to make new friends. It’s good to have someone to talk to” she said.

Now if I ask you guys –

Who do you think from both the stories is more likely to be happy? Roopa or Khushi?

Well… Idk who will be happy either. But most probably, it will be Khushi.

Let me tell you why –

A research was done by Harward University to predict the most basic factor for happiness. The study continued for 75 years. And what did they find out –

“The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.” — Robert Waldinger, director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development

Yesss that’s right.

Rich and satisfying relationships are important for your health and happiness.

This is not about introversion or extroversion. ‘Man is a social animal’. We need people. It’s about people. And the relationships you have with people in your life. Even a extrovert with lots of negative, unhealthy relationships will be unhappy. And a introvert with few quality, healthy relationships will be happy. It’s more about how you value relations and how you connect with people.

I’ve found this to be relatable and true in my experience. On some days when I don’t really talk to my friends or can’t maintain contact I feel unhappy, sad. (Esp during this lockdown period) When I have heart to heart conversations with friends and family and spend quality time with them I feel really good.

In words of Tal Ben-Shahar,

Having people about whom we care and who care about us to share our lives with—to share the events and thoughts and feelings in our lives—intensifi es our experience of meaning, consoles us in our pain, deepens our sense of delight in the world.

– Tal Ben-Shahar

Let’s try to stay more connected with our loved ones during this period. Let’s remind eachother, ‘we’re together, I have your back’

19 thoughts on “who will be more happy?

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